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Thread: Humor of the Sea

  1. #1751
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  2. #1752
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    Two sailors are talking:

    Sailor A: “I hear fish is good brain food.”

    Sailor B: “Yeah, I eat it all the time.”

    Sailor A: “Well, there goes another theory!”

  3. #1753
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  4. #1754
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  5. #1755
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  6. #1756
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    Tricky light change

    How many boaters does it take to change a lightbulb?

    None, because the right size bulb isn’t on board, the local marine-supply store doesn’t carry that brand, and the mail-order house has them on back-order.

  7. #1757
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

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    “I went on a sailing course in Poole.”

    “In Dorset?”

    “Yes, I’d recommend it to anyone.”

  9. #1759
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    Passing the Needles in the Fastnet race, one sailor hailed across the water to a rival yacht'sman who had just fallen into the sea.

    "Who's a lubber now." he shouted in solent ly.

    Rob.
    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  10. #1760
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  11. #1761
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    A new AB and OS cartoon.

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  12. #1762
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    Nice one Dave. One of my favourite sayings.
    Rob.
    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  13. #1763
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  14. #1764
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    Newbie: “Do yachts like this sink very often?”

    Skipper: “No, usually it’s only once.”

  15. #1765
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  16. #1766
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    "I finally snapped,” the man said. “Last night while I was going over the bills, I discovered how much money my wife squanders and I hit the roof.”

    “What did you do?” asked his friend.

    “I stormed into the bedroom and gave her a lecture on economy and thrift.”

    “Did it help?”

    “I’ll say. Tomorrow we’re selling my boat and sailing equipment.”

  17. #1767
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  18. #1768
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  19. #1769
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    That's a lot more PC than when I heard it Dave.
    Rob.
    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  20. #1770
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  21. #1771
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    Q: What does NAVY stand for?

    A: Never Again Volunteer Yourself!

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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  24. #1774
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  25. #1775
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    Two Sailors were talking about assignments they would like to get.

    First Sailor: “Someday I’d like to ride on a submarine.”

    Second Sailor: “Not me! I wouldn’t set foot on any ship that sinks on purpose!”

  26. #1776
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    A Navy Commander was upset with his son’s report card. All the subjects’ e.g. shooting, strategy and tactics got terrible grades except Math which had an A. The Navy Commander said ‘Kids these days spent more time dividing than conquering’.

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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  28. #1778
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  29. #1779
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    Here is a new AB and OS cartoon.

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  30. #1780
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  31. #1781
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    A Roman Numeral joke.

    Sailors are not long-lived, as a class; but though centenarians are scarce among them yet every sailor gets to C.

  32. #1782
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  33. #1783
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    A cruise ship passed by a remote island, and all the passengers saw a bearded man with an eye-patch running around and waving his arms wildly.

    “Captain,” one passenger asked, “who is that man over there?”

    “I have no idea,” the captain said, “but he goes nuts every year when we pass him.”

  34. #1784
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  35. #1785
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  36. #1786
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    Like it Dave.
    Rob.
    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  37. #1787
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  38. #1788
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    I expect that a French captain would raise a British flag.

  39. #1789
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  40. #1790
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  41. #1791
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  42. #1792
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  43. #1793
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

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  45. #1795
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

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  47. #1797
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  48. #1798
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  49. #1799
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    The Business of the commander-in-chief is first to bring an enemy fleet to battle on the most advantageous terms to himself, (I mean that of laying his ships close on board the enemy, as expeditiously as possible); and secondly to continue them there until the business is decided.

  50. #1800
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    A new AB and OS cartoon.

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